Random but Real

I’ve been thinking of writing a blog post for a long time but couldn’t; was busy with some important work. I was wondering a few days back while reading a book about how we get connected to things, people, places, and feelings even we try not to get more close to them. Honestly, I used to get attached with people a lot earlier, not because I like socializing but because part of me wanted to keep a few good people in my life always. But, thankfully, I am better now, or I should say I don’t find time to think a lot about who comes and who goes away from my life. I have some good people around me, and I am grateful for their presence.

One year ago, when I was reading ‘To All the Boys I’ve loved before’ by Jenny Han, I read something as: 'Cause the more people that you let into your life… The more they can just walk right out'. I found it quite relatable. You might have experienced this thing too in your life that we all are just walking on a track that is building just before we decide to walk on it. Not everything always goes like we’ve decided it to be. When we’re in school, we used to share with our parents how many friends we’ve, who they are, where they live, or how we enjoy with them during recess, and games period. However, gradually, this all came to get fade away. It’s not we did it intentionally; it’s just that life had no boundaries until we entered our teen days. When we were in class 9 or 10, works started getting assigned to us for completing them but with flexible deadlines. This goes with a person till class 12 as after that his and his friends’ paths part away. We all have to make an important decision regarding the future that we all were dreaming of since our parents taught us- ‘It is important to have a serious goal to become successful in life.’ By then, responsibilities started building walls around our ‘life’. We lost contact with most of our school friends, and then we started thinking of making new friends in college life. But now our choices for making a new friend changed; we don’t want to have a lot of friends. We want a loyal friend. A friend who makes us feels good when our mood is off, a friend who understands us even when we don’t know ourselves about the problem that’s bothering us. We expect an ideal friend that we know that such requirements aren’t fulfilled easily. When we successfully, or I should say apparently match our set parameters with the qualities in a person, we call him/her our friend. But, sadly, such a friendship doesn’t go long. It starts rifting just when a sudden minute misunderstanding creeps into the ‘Now and Forever Friendship’. We all know the reason: Expectations make relationships hollow.

The solution to this issue that I started practicing is – Keeping a healthy distance from the people you like. It never causes harm to your heart when things don’t go right because we all know that the only security guard who is looking after our heart and mental health is us. Make friends without thinking about the time when s/he couldn’t attend your phone call when you’re in an emergency the other day, don't give a single thought for who just said something stupid behind your back. Just enjoy with them when you get time to meet them, share and listen to each other’s music playlists, and just forget what all negative you’d one week ago about them. Retaining negative thoughts for anyone filths us and only us.

A fact related to this one: ‘Our brain generates 50K thoughts daily and out of which 10K are negative’. It is our choice to focus on one side out of these two so that we could remain happy – Positive/Negative. Make your choice wisely!

Yours,

Hakuna